One of my favorite quotes from Benjamin Franklin- his reflection on the joys and sorrows of bringing up children.
“When we launch our little fleets of barks into the ocean, bound to different ports, we hope for each a prosperous voyage. But contrary winds, hidden shoals, storms, and enemies come in for a share in the disposition of events; and though these occasion a mixture of disappointment, yet considering the rest where we can make no insurance, we should think ourselves happy if some return with success.”
On June 21, we welcome our “little fleet.”
We are only a few days short from Benjamin arriving, and my husband has shown so much love and support; I consider myself the luckiest person. There was never any doubt in my mind that he could be a wonderful husband and soon father.
When we first met, he mentioned he disliked the idea of work. Of course, I nearly panicked and rolled my eyes at the same time. Slowly, I started to notice he put in 14 hour work days and still managed to take me out on dates and never lose focus of what really matters, experiences and time.
He visualized life how I wanted it-worry free, always de-cluttering, and liberating.
He sets the best example of hard work, determination, and strength. He is also my reminder to live in the present and participate in life.
I don’t watch much television, but it seems I have accomplished more of it in the past few days than I could imagine. In between snacks, yoga, and meals, I managed to watch the following Netflix’s series.
1. Anne of Green Gables on Netflix. This series just makes me cry. Anne reminds me of my niece. She just wants to make friends, but somethings just work against her. Anne also inspires me want to read more book and say words like conundrum.
2. House of Cards on Netflix. Omg Frank and Claire are flipping crazy! I can’t say enough.
3. Cable Girls on Netflix. I love the 1920s era! I imagined myself with a cute bob, ruby red lipstick and a cigarette in my hand.
4. And currently 13 Reasons Why on Netflix. I feel this show is more for the teenage audience, so it’s taking me awhile to get to episode 2. However, I need to know what happens.
So now, I have a few weeks before Benjamin gets here. If anyone can recommend some new shows or movies, I’d love to add to my healthy dose of Netflix.
It’s a big week for me. It’s week #38. I’m a bit anxious, nervous, excited, but not fearful. If you ask my husband, he’ll tell you I’m afraid of everything. I wish I could be more like him, like go hike a mountain and go into an ocean full of sharks, but like Veronica-Pooh Nash-Poleate, I stay outta the sharks house. Yes, I’m fearful of large pools of water, roller coasters, flying roaches, mountain biking, snorkeling, and anything that might be remotely close to being on a North Face commercial.
One night after an event, I considered crying on my way home because of the results of that evening. I called my husband in frustration. I got home and showered, and I reminded myself that I am not that fearful person. Those scavengers/adventures/quest are not real reasons for me to be afraid.
The closer we get to meeting Benjamin, the sooner I get to share my experience with you.
As I prepare and get closer to my due date, I’m learning about the different stages of labor and pain. I read in a book last week that our endorphins are ten times more potent than morphine for pain. I was so fascinated with the potential our body has to overcome fear and pain. However, that is not to mislead anyone and tell them labor is painless, but I will have my husband to support me, my midwife to guide me, and Benjamin’s alligator onesie ready.
So on this day, I want to say happy mother’s day to all the mothers, especially mine! When she rubs my belly, she reminds me that labor will not be traumatizing, and I look forward to her nurturing oatmeal.
We started our birthing class this week, and at the beginning, we had to introduce ourselves- our name, our partner’s name, our baby’s name, and due date. Aside from the basic info, the women went in a circle sharing their story. For most, this is their first birth, for others, it is their second, and for one, it is a blessing. At 47, she is able to carry her first child. Listening to all their experiences and their journey nearly put me in tears.
So my journey goes like this.
My husband and I got married July 31, 2016. We went on vacation for three weeks, and somewhere in between the Caribbean and driving the Pacific coast, Benjamin was conceived.
I still remember that Saturday morning I took the pregnancy test.
The room was dark as I crawled back into bed and told my husband I was pregnant. We were both so happy!
Those small moments serve as a great reminder of what a privilege it is to walk this life.